Likeabilty vs.Authenticity

Chimamanda Ngozi is everything. I can attest that as a young woman of the 90’s I was socialized in a certain manner. Respectability, class and race had it’s pieces as well but the overarching theme was one of likeability. Don’t be too loud, too smart , too opinionated, because boys don’t like that. Don’t do this because then you’ll never get a boyfriend/fiancee/husband and so on and so forth.

I never cared for any of these notions and in retrospect, that is probably why I had such a hard time. I will never forget my first St.Patrick’s Day  (a holiday that I was unaware of until that point) my peers pinched me all day and had the nerve to be surprised when I hit them back. After a river of tears from my classmates,I was informed of the whole green clothing business and have given the day my side eye ever since. I type all that to say that even though I wasn’t cognizant of it I always chose my authentic feelings over the opinions of the crowd.Aside from an awkward coming of age, the lessons I learned on the way helped me become the woman that I am today. If you agree or know a girl that could use some advice on the topic I encourage you to watch this video !

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